The Spider Show

i should've seen these earlier

2009-05-25T22:56:00.005-06:00

Wow, over the past month I've seen two incredible movies that I really feel I should've watched the moment I had the chance to but didn't. They both were rented on iTunes, and they both were the only movies I've ever rented on iTunes. (This was when I put my computer right in front of my bed because Charlotte had the flu and I put the mainframe at the foot of the bed so we could watch movies, then I never put it in its proper spot until just today.) Both movies had me crying, one of which was at the end, the other was throughout. So, I'm going to tell you what the two movies were, and then I want to know if you ever had a chance to see these, and what you thought about them.

Movie 1: When Harry Met Sally

I was going out of my mind with people surrounding me at home, so I locked myself in my room and watched a romantic comedy by myself, and I totally fell in love with this movie. Instantly. I loved the old couple dialogues that appeared throughout the movie, I loved Smeg Ryan, I loved Carrie Snell-Fisher's promise about the wagon wheel, I loved the ending reach-out for Smeg's character by Billie's character, and I just cried and cried and cried. Bridger had to watch this for a film class, and he told me how much he liked it; I promised myself I'd watch it, but never did until now. The video below has two (2) F-words in it:

Movie 2: The Green Mile

Before I left for England, Charlotte and I made a list of movies that we wanted to watch together. She listed some that she had seen and I hadn't, I listed some that she hadn't seen that I had, etc. This TV show was on her list of I-have-seen-you-haven't-seens; we only watched one movie while I was there. We then made a list of movies again, this time for when she was coming here. We watched more than one movie, but The Green Mile wasn't one of them. So, a few days after I watched Smeg and Billie on the screen, I watched Tom Hanks and Morgan Fairchild go head-to-head in this wonderful film. I won't tell you much of what the picture includes, but I'll say that when I heard about this movie when it first came out, I simply thought it was a death-row, inmate, jail cell type of picture. It has a lot more than that, though. I had to cover my mouth with my hands as I sobbed when I watched this. Some really funny moments, some really graphically violent moments, and a lot of wonderful moments.

Have you seen these pictures? What did you think about them? Are there any movies that you haven't seen that you know you should see, or any that you finally got to see that you've been meaning to see for a long thyme?

I'm not sure if I'll keep doing any posts, but I wanted you to know that I loved these two movies very much.

Well...

2009-02-04T11:41:00.002-07:00

I think I'm almost positive that I'm done blobbing. It just doesn't suit my kneads.

End of the Year Thoughts

2008-12-10T14:22:00.002-07:00

I decided to post a best of 2008, considering that it's the end of the year and that it has been a great one, as far as years go. I realized after I typed that that it was true; some eventful thingz really have happened. What a nice thing. So I'll go through some of the best and worst items of the year, and we'll see what next year brings for us.

Best Song of 2008: Joe Hunt's Every Freakin' Night. I don't have to explain much more, it speaks for itself. I don't know if it was actually released in 2008 or not, but I learned about this modern piece of true musical art in 2008, so I'm counting it as such.

Worst Song of 2008: Joe Hunt's Every Freakin' Night. Once again, I don't have to explain much, it speaks for itself.

Favorite Album of 2008: Beck's Modern Guilt. I enjoyed it enough and haven't really gotten into other music that was released this year to be considered for this spot. I have been listening to a lot more music that is older recently, and looking for new music wasn't one of my hobbies this year.

Favorite trip of 2008: So far, it has been San Francisco. One exciting aspect of it was buying an additional plane ticket a day before the vacation for Charlotte. We drove in a Priceless Taste™ Cruiser, went on the Dangerous Minds roller coaster in Santa Cruz, saw works of art, had amazing breakfast, saw wonderful roses and trees, had a photoshoot in leopard and zebra print robes in a lavish hotel room, and experienced the BEST public bus ride - it definitely beat my crashing into a building when I was on a public bus in Clarksville, TN. As fantastic and relaxing that that vacation was, I'm pretty sure that my next trip of the year - starting in five days - will take the cake.

Favorite electronic gadget of 2008: My Nokia cell phone that I bought at Walgreen's® for twenty American dollars made me realize how much I don't need an elaborate cellular phone. After my semi-decent, moderately-priced phone's screen went on the fritz (in San Francisco, actually), I bought the Nokia so the rest of my party could contact me. It did the job, and I figured out how to work around its design flaws to turn it into a diamond in the rough. I lost it recently, and I'm heartbroken. I hope to get another one soon, but in the meantime will be out of touch with reality.

Favorite Movie of 2008: I really think this one goes to The Dark Knight, as much as it sounds like I'm one of those guys who has a poster of the movie and who also says: "Dude, I was so mad that Jack Nicholson wasn't going to be the Joker! But Heath Ledger looks waaaayyy awesome!" It really was a very well done movie, so good job to everyone who took part in it.

Favorite Snack of 2008: Banana. I'm pretty sure it's won the favorite snack award every year for the past 20 years.

Favorite Event of 2008: Getting to know Charlotte. It honestly made the year 1000 times better.

Favorite thing to not tell people about in 2008: My American Idol auditions. I had to tell the story again to my new boss, and I felt SO stupid explaining to someone that I actually tried out for that thing. I'm glad that I got fairly far compared to the rest of those bozos that tried out, but having to tell someone that I tried out for it makes me turn bright red.

Least-favorite thing to look forward to in 2009: American Idol season 8. I hope hope hope that they don't have my audition on the television set. I'll just collapse and die. Unless they just show me doing the movie trailer voice, then I'll be fine with it. But if they show me forgetting the lyrics to Ain't No Mountain High Enough by Marvin "Totally" Gaye, then I am going to move far away.

If any of these items change, or I decide to add more to the list, I promise you that I will post the changes.

Beep Beep

2008-10-10T10:24:00.004-06:00

I've been doing some side projects lately. I have produced some radio spots for local spa gurus Bullfrog Spas, the Richard Ellis for state treasurer campaign, and on Monday will be doin' some Rob Bishop for congress campaign radio spotz. I've made some X-tra money on the side for this and I'm pretty proud of myself. Here are two of the five commercials that I made:

Also, for those of you who don't already know, I'm heading to England in December for about 3 weeks and I am completely thrilled. I'm also going to be spending some time at Uncle Jack's oceanside bed and breakfast in Wales. Uncle Jack is an actual person. I realized after I typed that that it sounded like an actual place called Uncle Jack's B&B, but he actually is an uncle of someone.

Any exciting plans for anyone else?

Ecstasy and AIDS: The James Jarrard Story...

2008-09-16T20:48:00.004-06:00

I decided to give anyone who wanted to know about my experiences today (September 16th) the opportunity, so here goes my story of hope, betrayal, scandal, and glory:

As many of you know (and I wish now I hadn't told as many people as I did), I took the plunge and tried out for the 8th Season of American Idol. I know what your thinking: "But Jimmy, you're just silly and goofy!" Well, you're wrong. I am an incredible singer. In fact, I made it past two (2) rounds before my story came crashing down on me in disbelief. I tried out on July 29th, one of the longest days of my life, where I sang in front of producers with flying colors. After some interviews and questionnaires, I was told I would need to come back to the Energy Solutions Arena for my second audition (which was today).

Well, I showed up and learned that there were actually going to be two (2) rounds today. One was in front of more producers, where I would sing two (2) songs of my choosing. If the judges liked me, I would go on to another room where I would sing not only the two (2) songs, but a third song that, at the beginning of the day, we were told to learn. It was that nasty song Ain't No Mountain High Enough by Marvin "Totally" Gay [sic]. I've always dislike this song, but for the sake of the audition, I spent a lot of time memorizing the lyrics while I waited to audition. The first round of the audition, I only had to sing the two songs, but if one was to move on to the second audition (which I did), then you had to not only sing the two, but the third song that was to be learned that day.

The second audition room consisted of a backdrop and a nice little American Idol floor, surrounded by cameras and lights, and a big long table with the executive producers. You'd be thinking "Oh man I bet you were waaayyy nervous, James!" Well, let me say that I wasn't. My heart was beating a little faster than usual, but other than that I wasn't so nervous that I wouldn't perform poorly or forget any lyrics.

Well...

When I first got into the audition room, I had a great stature about myself. I stood up straight, I didn't cross my arms, and I made the execs (that's what you call 'em: execs) smile and laugh a bit with my antics (they asked to hear my Movie Trailer voice, and I indulged them. They really fell for it). My first two songs were a hit with the execs, and I thought I had the cat in the bag. When I got to Ain't No Mountain®, I started to sing, and it was going good until I COMPLETELY forgot the lyrics to the third line of the first verse. Completely. In order to casually dismiss this, I decided to make up the lyrics. That sounds like a good idea, right? Instead of stopping, apologizing, and quitting, it's usually better to move on like it never happened right? WRONG.

It would've worked had my improvised lyrics actually made sense. Looking back, I honestly can't remember what I said. The execs looked incredibly confused, and that in turn made me incredibly confused, and I sang the rest of the chorus in a completely strange falsetto voice that sounded like a witch's cackle. I didn't wait for them to stop me, I stopped myself and, after hearing what they had to say, gracelessly left with a bruised ego and a giant sticker on my stomach. It's a very funny story, honestly, and apart from feeling a little stupid, feel completely fine about it. I got very very far, and had I not forgotten the lyrics, I'm quite certain something positive would have come from this.

Well, that's the story. I hope you learned something from this. If you have any questions, feel free to ask and I have no problem giving you the dirty details.

omg

Running out of things to blob about...

2008-09-09T00:19:00.002-06:00

This semester I've been fickle about registering for classes. I finally settled for seven (7) credits, and the classes don't start until mid-October. I was pretty proud of myself for doing it. But then I noticed that one of the classes I signed up for isn't just a 5:30 - 9:20 Friday night class (and I was fine with sacrificing my Friday nights for this), but is also a 8:00 - 4:20 Saturday morning class as well. !!! I cannot let myself do something like that. I'd rather be found floating in the Jordan River bloated and dead. What a travesty. Who would in their right mind put in a full day of school on a Saturday?

Also, I decided as I was typing this to put in a survey:

Indepth Survey About You [Perfect For Allowing People To Get To Know You Better]

::Background Info::
Name: James
Age: 23
Date of Birth: Valentine's Day
Place of Birth: Murray
Ethnic Background/Ancestry: Native American
Languages You Speak: English, a little Spanish, one phrase in Italian
Relationship Status: In one
School Situation: Sort of in school (see above)
Job Situation: In a job, looking for another one as well
Do you drive?: Yes. I drive a 4 door car.
Do you smoke cigarettes?: Not lately.
Do you drink alcohol on a regular basis?: Not regularly
Do you do recreational drugs at least occasionally?: I've watched the TV show Weeds and it made me think that I would love to try it.
Family Situation [Who do you live with?]: My parents. It's just the three of us.
::Your Appearance [Physical]::
Natural hair color: Believe it or not, I'm a blonde.
Hair Type [Straight, Wavy, Curly, etc]: Sort of straight, sort of wavy.
Long or short?: Short
Current Hair Style: Unbelievably bad
Eye color: Brown
Eye shape: Oval, deep-set, like the sea
Do you have freckles?: No
Skin tone/complexion: Olive
Do you have a tan?: No
Height: 6
Body Type/Build: fatso
Shoe Size: 10
Any scars?: on my left arm
Physical feature that stands out the most: i have a big clay nose
::Your Appearance [Fashion]::
Tattoos?: I have a bass clef inside a rhombus on my inner thigh
Piercings?: .
What subculture do you gravitate towards the most?: Goth
How would you describe your style?: Goth
Tshirts and jeans -or- Dresses/Suits?: A nice pair of jean
Sneakers -or- Heels/Dress Shoes?: a beautiful pair of heel
Tight or baggy pants?: tight
What color do you wear most often?: a lighter bleu shade
What do you wear on an average day around the house?: shirt and tie
What do you wear to sleep?: suit and tie
What is your jewelry style?: pearls pearls pearls
How about shoes? Any brands you love/wear a lot?: i like my slip onz
Do you paint your nails?: not since the accident
What is your make-up style?: blush, rouge, gloss. repeat.
Do you carry around bags or purses?: when i travel
What are your favorite accessories?: blush, rouge, gloss. repeat.
Do you wear sunglasses a lot?: no.
What is your favorite way to dress? [Sexy, Cute, Modest, Professional, etc]: modest
Does fashion mean a lot to you?: not particularly
::Your Beliefs::
Do you have a religion/spirituality?: yes i do
Do you believe in a supreme being?: yes i do
Life after death?: yes
Heaven and Hell?: these sticky buns are just heaven
Angels and Demons?: Angel hair pasta
Aliens?: n/a
Reincarnation?: as a wolf
Horoscopes?: when desperate
Fortune Telling?: i would love to
If you have a faith/relgion, is it the most important thing in your life?: it should be, and i'm trying harder to do that
What are your views on abortion?: this makes me not even want to continue the survey
Gay marriage?: omfg
Politics?: no one's business
Political Correctness?: omfg
Are you more Liberal or Conservative?: n/a
How do you feel about sex outside of marriage?: feels great
::Dating and Relationships::
Would you date a person with a different religion than you?: yeah
How about polar opposite political beliefs?: n/a
What are qualities you look for in a bf/gf?: T&A
What kind of personality issues do you dislike?: personality
Looks or personality?: looks
Are you shallow?: yes
Do you fall in love easily?: i do
How do you know you like someone?: when that person is constantly on my mind
What do you usually do when you like someone, or think you like someone?: nothing
Do you like to take things fast or slow?: medium
Casual dating -or- Serious committed relationship?: medium
What is your philosophy on dating/love/relationships?: screw this
Is there a difference between liking someone and having a crush on someone?: n/a
Do you like the other person to make the move first?: well, i feel stupid after the other person moves first because i realize that i should've moved first
What would ruin a relationship?: murder
Would your ideal guy/girl call you? Or would you call them?: medium
Would you expect them to make all the moves?: no
Would you expect them to be with you 24/7?: no
Are you a jealous person?: no
Obsessive?: no
Overly emotional?: no
Do you think you would be a good gf/bf?: yes
::Your Future::
What do you want to do with your life?: win american idol
Is getting married important to you?: it actually is
Want kids?: three girls
How many?: three
Do you wanna be rich?: idk anyone who doesn't
If you had to choose between a huge career and a family, would you?: i would choose
What is your idea of success?: 12 figure salary
What is your main goal in life?: 12 figure salary
::A Little Bit of Random Stuff::
Favorite music?: anything but RAP and Country! eww!!
Favorite bands/artists?: blah blah blah
Any plans for today?: Sleepin in
What do you like to do with your free time?: make food

I'm Tired

2008-07-29T15:55:00.001-06:00

I've never felt more exhausted in my entire life. God Bless America

I'm Nervous

2008-07-28T19:32:00.002-06:00

My heart is pounding, and I haven't even began my audition for A.I. Season 8.

Pray that I won't be nervous. That's all I really need now.

Leavin' Town...

2008-06-29T23:46:00.007-06:00

I'm leavin' town this week, and I'm pretty excited about it. I'm goin' to this one place in Oregon for a few days; it's a nice little area on the coast called Cannon Beach. I've been there several times, and it's always a real treat when I go. It's about 75 miles from Portland and about 12 miles from Seaside and Astoria. To the left is a waterpaintin' I found on the World Wide Web which is kind of a nice re-enactment of the beach there. Each time I've been to CB, I've had a memorable experience. In 2006, I went with my whole family and my brother got married on the beach, and it was an incredible time. The following year, I sailed there with Bridger W., Sarah-Ashley W., Derek W., and Dawn A. We rented a bike thing and enjoyed the bumper cars and lost our minds. Are there any exciting vacation spots that you enjoy? Let's have a discussion about this.

Also, tonight I've been working on my next movie trailer. I won't be finished with it until the following week or so, but I think it's going to be pretty good. It has a more solemn, serious side to it rather than the Romantic Comedy Shoot-em-up movie. Be prepared for this next one. It's a murder mystery period piece.

Here is a link to my last movie trailer. Click HERE.

MUSICIAN'S FRIEND HAS THE WORST CUSTOMER SERVICE

2008-06-05T20:27:00.003-06:00

A little while ago, my BFF Tina Jo Smith made a post about the incredible support Amazon.com has to offer. He told a great story of friendliness, understanding, and peace.

My story, however, makes me very grumbly. I placed an order recently on Musician's Friend's website - an order that would complete the new drum kit that I bought in February. It was a new ride cymbal, a new pair of hi-hats, and a beautiful new drum throne. (The drum throne that I ordered was not that hideous gold one, as the link that I threw in suggests).

The first time, they got the order wrong. I got an e-mail verifying to me what was ordered, and believe me, the items were WRONG. The nice thing about that, though, is that the wrong items were actually on backorder, so they never fully processed the order. So I call in to cancel the order and make the applicable changes, and some grouchy young adult named Steve or something tells me he's done so.

After three days (the young man on the phone who probably loves Muse and has sleeves of tattoos all over his body told me it would be the next day), I hear nothing of my order. I call in tonight to find out, and this punk kid Matt says that I was over my limit! Ya know what happened? Steve never cancelled the order, so when I placed an order it pretty much double charged me, and the second order never went through. The punk kid Matt then says: "Well, call the issuer of the card and find out what happened." MUSICIAN'S FRIEND ISSUED ME THE CARD! Then this little whore tells me: "And I'm about to go home, so call in the morning and you can figure out what to do." It was 7:50 at night.

Never shop at Musician's Friend. Never shop at Guitar Center. You might ask after those two statements: "Well Jim, where could I shop for musical deals then?" Go to Sam Ash. They not only have a call center and the EXACT same prices as Musician's Enemy, but in-store locations throughout the United States. I've visited one in Nashville, and I'll tell ya, it was a great place!

Tell every single person that you know.

Lighthearted Romantic Comedy

2008-05-26T21:45:00.007-06:00

After weeks of waiting, my new movie trailer is now available for all to listen. There is a cameo voiceover by my sister Jenny (at the beginning), but the rest of the voices are by me. I have a lot of fun listening to it, so I hope that you enjoy it as much as I do. For those of you who haven't heard my first movie trailer, I'll stick it here as well so you can hear both of them. I'm hoping to release more of these; as many as I can, actually. Listen to it, love it, believe it's real.

The Movie - Romance, Action, Action, and More Action

The First Movie - Best Summer of the Year

The Beautiful Ms. Kelly Creamer

2008-05-25T20:52:00.007-06:00

These pictures are from this guy's website, and they are all screenshots of news stories and such from his television set. I picked my three favorite:

Also, Stereogum made a Memorial Day playlist for its readers, and this song on the list is way fun to listen to. At least wait for the background singers if you don't like it.

Music Go Music - Light of Love

Nano™ Technology

2008-05-07T19:29:00.003-06:00

About a month ago, I was given the opportunity to donate to the United Way at my work - an opportunity that would enter me into a drawing to win either a MacBook Air, a big ol' plasma TV, a Nintendo Wii, and an iPod Nano. I completely forgot about the whole thing except for keeping the dream of winning the MacBook Air on the back of my mind. Well, I came into work today to find an e-mail letting me know that I won a brand new 4GB iPod Nano! What an exciting day this is for me! It's going to come to me via interoffice mail within two weeks!

In other news, I fear that I'm going to join a jazz chorus in school come fall semester. My voice teacher for the summer semester recommended me to it. So expect me to be wearing this soon:

PS: I'm almost done with another movie trailer, so expect it to blow your mind away in a day or two.

Kitty

2008-04-04T10:57:00.004-06:00

I found this on some website today and I just wanted to share it:

I would like to make a banner like this and post it up all over town.

Eight Worlds in Eight Days - the Finale

2008-03-26T22:28:00.017-06:00

Dark Land

Or, the Castle of Koopa

In the Japanese instruction manual for the first Super Mario Bros., Bowser's name is known as Daimao: Koopa (Great Demon King: Koopa). When I was doing research on him, I found several sources that stated that Morton Koopa was his father's name (the second Koopa kid in SMB3 is Morton Koopa, Jr., so there goes that mystery) and that Bowser stabbed his father to death to take the throne as Koopa King. The thing about that, however, is that I'm not sure how true that statement is - none of those websites stated the source for that information. But I liked it, and I wanted to give a small background of the Koopa King today. Today, I'm going to talk about the final world in SMB3, Dark Land. This past week has been very time consuming for me, and just getting to this final spot was a breath of fresh air.

Click to enhance

As you can see, the world is separated into four parts. The first part includes what looks to be the first wave of Bowser's army. There is a group of tanks that you must defeat, and then there is a group of ships that you need to defeat. I took my time with both of these, trying not to rush through them and make a simple mistake that could cost me a Mario. The frame to the right gives an example of the wave of tanks that shoot Bob-Ombs, Bullet Bills and cannons at you. About the Rocky Wrench character that throw wrenches at you, the US SMB3 instruction manual says: "Rocky is a turtle who kind of looks like a mole. He will suddenly appear and throw wrenches at Mario." Why didn't they just call them moles? I always thought that they were moles, and never assumed differently. I can picture some awful announcer naming off the enemies in this game and putting a lot of emphasis on kind of when he gets to Rocky Wrench. Anyway, the tank level was defeated after two tries. It was simple, and the boss at the end was a boomerang-throwing Hammer Brother. The boat level was pretty similar, only this time, I didn't die at all. The water at the bottom looks like lava, so you might think you'll die if you fall in it. But don't worry. You can swim around - just don't be in the water for too long or Mario will get caught in the wake of the ships. After defeating those two waves of enemies, I took the pipe to the second section, which has the smaller levels that you play by chance if the hand pulls you into them. It looks like there are five of those levels, but there are only three in actuality. I only had to play two of them, and I got a leaf in each to add to my satchel.

The third wave of enemies is the airship level, which moves a lot faster than the other airships prior and requires a lot of skill to jump from platform to platform.

I died several times trying to beat this level without using my P-wing, but after a few tries I had to use it. I only had two more left after that, so I made sure that I wasn't careless when I was flying around, trying not to get hit by a wrench. Near the end I got hit, but I made it to the boss and defeated it. The second section of Dark Land was over.

The third section has actual levels that you play, and since darkness surrounds Mario, you can't tell how many levels there are. I'll tell you, though. There are only two levels and one mini-fortress in the third section - but they are the most difficult levels of the game. The first level, I lost a lot of Marios. I was down to 28. So, I used my second P-wing, and decided to bypass most of the level. I flew up to the sky and found a pipe that led me to an area that gave me three 1Up mushrooms. Redemption. After that, I pretty much avoided most of the twists and turns by staying airborne. The second level was even more difficult. Not only are there dozens of fireball spitting piranha plants, but the evil sun from world two made an appearance. I gave in to temptation, and used my last P-wing. All that was left of the third section was the mini-fortress.

The mini-fortress has honestly got to be the most difficult level in the entire game. There are doors everywhere that you can choose to enter, thwomps that not only go up and down, but diagonally and sideways and every which ways you can think of. When you go through one door, you are thrust upon a moving platform that leads straight to a lava pit. It's a giant two-dimensional maze, and you can't tell where you're going or where you've been. After losing ten Marios, I used one of the last items in my satchel, which was the cloud. I skipped over the fortress and took the pipe to the fourth and final section of Dark Land.

The last section has one final wave of enemies, which are all on tanks once again. This not only had cannons shooting at me from the bottom, but from the top as well. It was very difficult, but well worth it because the last and final challenge was Bowser's Castle.

Although I lost fifteen Marios on Bowser's castle, I honestly think that the level itself is a lot easier than the mini-fortress. There were two things that really made this level exciting: 1. Bowser built his castle with beautiful red brick, and 2. that there are statues of Bowser everywhere, some of which shoot an unending stream of lasers from their eyes. Here are several screenshots of the last level of SMB3:

The grand entrance to Koopa's Castle:

The maze of beautiful red brick:

Nearing Bowser, laser-shooting statues

When I got to Bowser's castle, all I had left in my satchel was a frog suit and a hammer. The two things that at the time were incredibly useless. The hammer wouldn't do anything, and as soon as I put on the frog suit I would get shot by the laser beams. So what I decided to do was to stay as regular Mario and get as far as I could, figuring out where I needed to go in this maze to get to the end. I would then use my frog suit - which I would lose at the very beginning, but get to the end as Super Mario. After more than a dozen tries, I found out where I needed to go to get to Bowser.

It was time. The way that Koopa attacks is shoot two or three well-aimed flames at you, and then fly in the air and try to stomp on top of you. What needs to be done is moving out of the flames and out of the way when he lands on the ground. He breaks the brick when he lands, so you have to get him to land in the same spot several times so he falls to his doom. I'll just say that I only needed one try to do this. I didn't feel very great after I defeated him, just very lazy. After I entered the door that opens when you defeat Bowser, I was even more disappointed when I found Princess Toadstool and she gave me this message:

Click to enhance

It's like an obnoxious text message you receive from an acquaintance that doesn't have any sense of humor at all. The "Bye bye." at the end was especially disappointing. I felt I deserved a little more of a thank you from this woman. I also didn't find it very believable that after I found her cringing in the corner of that room, the first thing she says when she sees Mario is some light-hearted, unfunny banter. However, I did accomplish that which I promised I would do, and I did get a nice slideshow of all eight worlds of SMB3 after I beat the game, so the week long journey ended up to be worthwhile.

I also spent a lot of time learning about this game, and I want to express my humble gratitude to Wikipedia, The Mushroom Kingdom website, and SMB3.com for the incredible amount of information I received on Super Mario Bros. 3 and its history.

Eight Worlds in Eight Days

2008-03-26T21:10:00.015-06:00

Pipe Maze

Today, as I was about to play the Pipe Maze, something terrible happened. I turned on my Wii and effeminately flicked my wrist over to play SMB3, and when it loaded to the game screen, the connection with my Wii remote was lost. I pushed reset to fix the problem, and all of my progress got erased. I stared at the television set with a stare of complete horror. All of the work I put into this...gone? I was honestly on the verge of becoming extremely emotional. All of the power-ups I had been saving, the 1 million plus points I had acquired, all gone. The thought came to me that I should just give it up and quit. But I couldn't let you down. I couldn't let myself down. So, I started over.

I went through world one as fast as I could; but I told myself that this time, I would get every secret imaginable. During level one, I did the trick that makes a floating ghost ship appear on the map so I could get a lot of coins. Check. I got the two whistles. Check. And I got the white mushroom house from level four. Check. I played the card game, and didn't miss a single card. When I got to level two, I got the third whistle, and then warped to level five to get two Tanooki suits. Check. I then warped to level six and got the first Hammer Brothers suit of the game, and then warped to level seven to defeat the levels and redeem my mistakes.

Although I don't have 1 million points, I do have 40 Marios and a satchel full of power-ups. I was ready for Pipe Land. This may be my third favorite world, and that's because it is a very unique world with levels that require a lot of skill. Instead of Hammer Brothers mini-games, there are two Piranha Plant mini-games that are incredibly tricky. The levels themselves are very taxing, too. A lot of mazes and simple mistakes that can send you back to where you started from.

You might recognize this. It's a very popular scene from level one, and when I was younger I would play this level and then warp straight to world eight because the rest of world seven was too hard for me. Times change. After I made the decision to come back strong, I don't think I've played any video game with more heart than I did tonight. The two most difficult levels for me were eight and the second mini-fortress. After dying three times on level eight, I put on a P-wing and flew over the entire level. Now, that's usually something I don't believe is right, but it was something that had to be done at this time. The second fortress, I lost six Marios. Here are several screenshots from that fortress:

Definitely the hardest mini-fortress so far. I refrained from using my good stuff on this level, and stuck to stars, flowers, and mushrooms. All that was left was the last Piranha Plant mini-game and then onto Ludwig von Koopa.

Obviously named after Ludwig van Beethoven, this Koopa (pictured to the right) is Bowser's second in command, and his airship definitely proved his rank. It was very similar to the airship that is in Dark Land (world eight) that is nothing but little airships that shoot flames, and you have to jump to each one to stay alive. I didn't die, but I definitely recognized the difficulty as I struggled to keep from throwing the controller across the room in frustration. He looked a lot different from the other Koopas. He was the biggest, and had a deep forest green hue, rather than the normal light green skin tone. He would go inside his shell and pound on the ground, which would normally make Mario loose his footing, but I quickly went in and defeated him. It was over. The stressful experiences that led me up to world seven were done with, and all I have to do now is go through Dark Land and defeat Bowser.

I have a lot of items in my satchel, and I now have 35 Marios. Do you think that what I had to do to get to world seven today counted? Did I do the wrong thing? Should I have started all over and go through each world, until I got to world seven? Let me know your thoughts.

The final battle will be tomorrow.

Eight Worlds in Eight Days

2008-03-25T00:09:00.002-06:00

The Ice Land

OMG, definitely one of the hardest trials I've ever had in my life. This world features three mini-fortresses, ten levels, three Hammer Brothers, and only two mushroom houses. I decided to skip over three levels, levels two, six, and nine - which I'm sure really saved my Marios. I died several times and lost one of my cherished Tanooki suits, two stars, two mushrooms, a P-wing, and a flower. However, the cycle of life carried on, and with it I received a hammer, a mushroom, a star, a cloud, a P-wing, and I received my first Hammer Brothers suit of the game. I would've had a lot more in my satchel because I matched all of the cards in one try when a new card game house appeared, but my satchel was too full. Damn.

These three fortresses definitely were the hardest I've experienced this past week, each one with a new problem that made my life difficult. The first fortress, I had to deal with the moving donut platform that you have to ride for the first half of the level.

During level three, I took the growing vine up to the pipe where I received a Tanooki suit without having to use my own, which was great. So when I got to the fortress, I wouldn't have a problem with the rotodiscs and flying flames that are so prevalent during the donut platform ride. But times change. I turned into the Ksitigarbha a little early, and was hit by the last remaining rotodisc of my ride. I then eventually fell to my demise that turn, and tried to once again go through the level with my own Tanooki suit. I made it, but the Boom-Boom (the boss at the end of each mini-fortress) made me lose my dignity. It was a humbling experience for me.

The second mini-fortress was incredibly difficult. This time, the entire fortress is encased in ice, making it a slippery situation for me. The Thwomps are everywhere, too, so timing is everything.

As you can see, it was no picnic. After dying several times, I finally made it to the second Boom-Boom. But I perished. I was livid. I threw in a flower and I barely defeated the level. My blood pressure finally dropped, but rose again when I realized it wasn't over. I rushed through the remaining levels, hoping that I wouldn't overstep or push jump a little late or early.

The third fortress came into view, and I knew I was done for. This time, the character Stretch makes its second appearance. Stretch is the ghost that looks like a long white platform, but every few seconds his head pops out of the top or bottom and wreaks havoc for any player.

The people movers weren't very helpful at all, either. In the picture above, that particular people mover moves Mario away from the upcoming Thwomp, making it almost impossible to not get hit by it. I kept getting hurt by it, and eventually getting killed near the end. I decided to use one of my P-wings. I flew up to the top of the level (there are some secret blocks up there filled with coins and a 1Up mushroom), and did a great job of avoiding everything. When I got to the Boom-Boom, I got hurt twice, but eventually defeated him as regular Mario.

Lemmy Koopa (pictured to the left) has been known to be one of the hardest Koopa kids to defeat. He bounces around on that little ball, and every few seconds the ball somehow duplicates itself and one ball after another bounces around the arena. It makes it very difficult, but I only got hurt once at the airship part (I was Raccoon Mario at the time) and defeated him on one try. Looks like I didn't get the cold shoulder after all.

Pipe Land is next. The gateway to Bowser. This world is very tricky, but it is still one of my favorites because it's very unique from the rest of the worlds. And how I find my way out of the Pipe Maze, we'll see next time. Because we are out of time.

I now have 1,026,873 points.

Eight Worlds in Eight Days

2008-03-24T17:27:00.002-06:00

Sky Land

As I said earlier, Sky Land (simply known as The Sky in the early US release) is one of my favorite worlds, and I think that the majority of SMB3 players would agree. Not only does the Tanooki suit make its appearance (see previous post), but you get to wear Goomba's shoe in level three, take the trip up to the sky with the spiral castle, take flight with the beetles on level six, hang loose with the falling donut platforms, and much, much more.

In level one, the first enemy you see is the chain chomp, which, after SMB3, will take the Mushroom Kingdom by storm. Shigeru Miyamoto, the chief director of SMB3, said that the chain chomp was one of his favorite characters. Of the chain chomp, Miyamoto said "...this is a strange enemy because it is chained and can't get at Mario, which probably accounts for it's vicious behavior" (Nintendo Power, 1988). Vicious indeed, and Miyamoto said he got the inspiration for the chain chomp from a bad experience he had with a dog when he was young. My experience with the chain comp was much more positive. I used my first P-wing for this level, and I flew up to the pipe in the sky, and got three extra Marios and a lot of coins. I then went back into the pipe, and took the secret exit out (where you receive a music box inside a treasure chest). The second level was a breeze as well, and I received yet again three more Marios, got a star card, and visited the mushroom house to get my first Tanooki suit of the game.

Before heading straight into level three to get inside Goomba's shoe, I defeated the mini-fortress and the two hammer brothers. The shoe in level three is very popular, and when you finally get to use it for the brief period of time, you'll understand why.

I had a good time with it. You can go pretty much anywhere with the shoe, and I love how long across you can jump while wearing it, and that you see the other creatures donning the same outfit. After defeating level three, I moved my way upward - to the sky - via the spiral castle. Now I had to defeat levels four through nine, plus the other mini-fortress, before I got to Roy Koopa. Level five, where the ground is made up of those wobbly donuts that can't hold you up for much time, is where I first got hold of my Tanooki suit. I liked it so much that I actually killed several of my Marios on purpose just so I could play that level a little longer.

I got all of the coins in level five, which means that I get the bonus White Mushroom house. Also, at the same time the WMH appeared, the matching card game appeared (which appears every 80,000 points). Double whammy! I got a P-wing at the WMH, and got some flowers, a mushroom, and a star at the card matching tournament. I defeated the rest of the levels, and had a great time defeating Roy. It was a lot of fun with Roy because I had about four close calls when fighting him, but didn't die once. Princess Toadstool's letter had a cloud power-up again, which was nice. My satchel currently has: a whistle, a leaf, a whistle, a P-wing, a music box, a frog suit, a whistle, a frog suit, a music box, a cloud, a P-wing, a star, a music box, a tanooki suit, a P-wing, a star, a mushroom, a P-wing, a tanooki suit, a flower, a music box, and a cloud.

Tomorrow is the dreaded Ice Land, which might be one of my least favorite worlds to play. We'll see how it goes tomorrow.

Eight Worlds in Eight Days

2008-03-24T00:04:00.001-06:00

The Tanooki Suit

When doing research about SMB3, I read a lot of information on the different power-ups that Mario can get on his adventure. One of the most popular, and definitely most memorable of these power-ups is the famous Tanooki (or Tanuki) Suit. Tanuki is the Japanese word for raccoon dog, and in Japan, there is a lot of folklore that surrounds the raccoon dog.

The tanuki is reputed to be mischievous and a master of disguise and shapeshifting. In the case of Super Mario Bros. 3, the Tanooki Suit transforms Mario into one of these mischievous raccoon dogs, and with this power-up he has the ability to shapeshift into a statue, making him invulnerable to all sorts of perils (and can apparently defeat the dreaded rotodiscs, which cause a lot of havoc in the mini-fortresses). When I first started playing SMB3, I thought for sure that Mario turned into some sort of a baker or fisherman, and I haven't ever questioned that. But when I was about to start my eight worlds in eight days goal, I did some research and found out that the statue that Mario turns into is a Buddhist Ksitigarbha statue. Ksitigarbha is known in Buddhism as the bodhisattva (or "enlightened one") of the hell beings. His famous vow recited by many Buddhists is: Not until the hells are emptied will I become a Buddha; Not until all beings are saved will I certify to Bodhi (or achieve Buddhahood). In Japan, Ksitigarbha is one of the most loved of all Japanese divinities as he is seen as the guardian of children. Below is a picture of a Japanese Ksitigarbha statue:

I thought it appropriate when I learned of the statue that Mario transforms himself into when he wears the shapshifting Tanooki Suit. Wikipedia really does have all the answers in the world. The beginning half of the game doesn't really have any Tanooki suits that you can use, except for level four, which is cursory at best. So although level four gives the Tanooki suit a brief introduction and cameo, Sky Land really gives it a chance to shine. I'll get to play world five tomorrow, and I'm incredibly excited.

Eight Worlds in Eight Days

2008-03-23T16:57:00.001-06:00

Giant Land

This is one of my favorite worlds to play, which is second only to Sky Land. I sort of sped through this world, but I still had a great time. The first level has always been a great introduction to the giant enemies, blocks, pipes, clouds, etc. The first two levels were a breeze to play, and I got star cards on both levels. The third level, however, caused me some grief. At the beginning of the level, there are two BIG hammer brothers that stomp on the ground, paralyzing Mario for a brief period of time. After the two hammer brothers, a pipe leads you to the main part of the level, which mainly has the beetles and spiked creatures as the opposition. I started out on world 4 with 12 Marios, but after level 3, I only had 3 Marios left. But fortunately, I got the third star card, which gave me a 5Up, giving me 8 remaining Marios.

The first mini-fortress was very troublesome. This had the first appearance of the candle flames that follow you around. After crossing their path, I hit a P-block, and went to the secret door that is just to the left of it. The picture below shows you what I'm talking about. The blue coins are arranged in a way that implies that there is a secret door. After I entered it, I was fortunate enough to get four 1Up Mushrooms in a secret room. It really made my day today.

After I completed the first mini-fortress, I continued on with levels four-six. The most exciting of the levels was probably number six, which is where there are doors that allow you to switch between a giant-sized reality and a normal-sized reality. It was a lot of fun.

The thing about Giant Land is that it sort of feels like a filler world, even though it has characters and scenery of elephantine proportions. You see, there are only six levels, whereas levels three and five have nine levels. The levels themselves are short and not as difficult as Ocean Side, and the rest of the worlds after Giant Land have a lot more levels and a lot more difficulty within them. I will tell you, though, that Iggy Koopa's airship (Iggy Koopa, as you might have guessed, was named after Iggy Pop) was very difficult for me. There are no bullet bills or cannon balls, but it has those flame throwing things that make timing everything. Iggy Koopa himself is pretty similar to Larry and Morton (not Wendy, though; she's a nasty strumpet), so he was pretty easy to defeat.

I completed Giant Land, and have now moved on to Sky Land, which is my favorite. Since it is my favorite, I'll have a lot of detail and history to give you all. Have a good night.

Eight Worlds in Eight Days

2008-03-22T02:16:00.001-06:00

Ocean Side

Ocean Side was the original name of this world before they changed it to Water Land, which isn't nearly as glamourous or whimsical. Although the world is very pretty to look at, and the music at the map screen is a lot of fun, don't be fooled. I had a very hard time today. Those underwater flowers that shoot some sort of red spore are hard to get around. That is, if you don't have a frog suit. I like the frog suit mainly because you can stand still in the water and not sink to the bottom. The problem with the frog suit (or any specialty suit) for me is that I try to be extra cautious when I am using it, which actually does more harm than good. After completing the first few levels, I had the opportunity to play the card game. I got 20 coins and a star. But don't worry, I had the opportunity to play the card game later on during today's game play, and I completed the entire board.

The first mini-fortress is a big problem. This fortress has a lot of different doors to choose from, and when you choose the wrong door, you fall into a pool of water and have to swim back and try again to pick the right door. Let me save some grief for future Ocean Side visitors by saying that the sixth door leads you to the exit, and the fifth door leads you to an extra Mario.

After I defeated the boss of the mini-fortress, I was thrown into a hammer brothers fight. I slaughtered them. I got a hammer from them, which I used to smash the rock that blocks the way to the little boat. I LOVE this little boat. It's really fun to take the boat to the little islands.

It was like a little vacation. There are three (only two are shown) Mushroom houses and two Spade houses. I am really bad at matching the picture for the Spade house mini-game. I took some time to float around in my boat, and then I went back to finish stages 5 - 9. During stage five, I put on a frog suit. I got hurt very quickly, but the beginning of the level it was very easy to swim around. The rest of the levels were rushed through because my nephews and niece found me playing video games and they kept wanting to play. I told them that I'm doing a special project and they needed to wait. So they sat and watched me play while I was really distracted by their wiggling around and yelling.

Finally, I got to Wendy Koopa's airship. This was completely terrifying. I kept getting hurt and going into the boss screen as regular Mario. The thing that's different about Wendy Koopa's boss lair is that she shoots inflatable life-saving tubes at you, and they bounce around the area, making it really hard to jump on her without getting hurt. I kept losing Marios, and I kept contemplating using my warp whistle to skip over the last level. But I refrained. I used a raccoon leaf and made it to Wendy Koopa as Super Mario, so I was able to defeat her. It was a nice time. My satchel has two frog suits, a lot of flowers and stars, a cloud power-up, a music box, the three whistles, four leaves, two mushrooms. I've had a really good run so far.

One of my favorite worlds will be tomorrow, which is Giant Land.

Eight Worlds in Eight Days

2008-03-22T01:02:00.001-06:00

The Desert Land

According to The Mushroom Kingdom website, Desert Land was originally called "Desert Hill" when SMB3 originally released in the US. A later version was released, and the name was changed to the simple Desert Land as we now know it to be called. Starting out tonight, I had a rough time. I lost about 3 mans within the first few seconds of the first level just because of those blocks that have little goombas hidden inside of them, and I also died several times because of the koopa that is near the beginning. But after that, I got into my normal swing of things and was able to get back the Marios that I lost. As you can see from the picture to the right, I had two star cards before I started level one. Unfortunately, I got a mushroom card, so I didn't get a 5Up. I then had the opportunity to line up an item at the spade house, and my picture ended up being this:

It looks like the star is wearing a swimming cap. During the second level, I made several attempts to get every coin, because a white mushroom house appears and you get an anchor from Toad. I wasn't able to do it - it was pretty hard. I zipped through the mini-fortress, where Boo makes his first appearance. In the original instruction manual, his name was originally called "Boo" Diddley, which I learned paid tribute to the popular blues artist Bo Diddley. The boss, as usual, was very easy to defeat. Only worlds one and two have just one mini-fortress. The rest of them have two, except level six, which has three.

I continued playing, and I got to play the matching card game twice. The first time, I only got a flower and 20 coins, but the second time I was able to complete the set of cards. I defeated all of the hammer brothers mini-games, and I got the hammer, where I was able to smash the rock at the top right of the map and obtain both the frog suit and the third whistle, which I obtained from the fireball shooting hammer brothers. The picture below shows my progress after I got the third whistle and frog suit:

The airship this time around gave me a lot of grief. Bullet Bills were everywhere this time, and the first appearance of the wrench-throwing moles made me lose my mind. Morton Koopa was hard to beat, mainly because I always went in there just as regular Mario, not Super- or Raccoon- or any-Mario you could think of. But I got him. The King was transformed back into his normal self (he was a spider) and I got a letter.

I have a pretty big satchel now. I still have what I had in the Grass Land, plus an extra whistle, a cloud thing that I got from the Princess (where you can bypass a difficult level), a music box, the frog suit, and some of the basic power-ups.

I mentioned earlier that there was an earlier US version that was first released. Some words were changed around in the letters from the Princess and the phrases that the Toad says to Mario before the beginning of the mini-games. Here are some examples:

Note the difference between the two. The last letter I got from the princess was the one where she writes "...goomba's shoe" instead of "...Kuribo's shoe." The former was the later version released in the US. I had a lot of fun playing Desert Land tonight; I had a big smile throughout. Tomorrow, I will be in Water Land. From what I remember, I always get upset playing the Water Land stage.

Eight Worlds in Eight Days

2008-03-21T00:56:00.001-06:00

As a personal goal of mine this upcoming week, I will be completing one world a day, while keeping an online diary of my journey, of Super Mario Bros. 3 (1990, NES). I don't know why I decided to waste so much time with this, but I have. I'll include in depth detail of my journey in each land; and on Thursday, March 27, I plan to have completed the game.

The Grass Land

Tonight, I completed the first world of Super Mario Bros. 3, the Grass Land. I was able to get both warp whistles this time around; the whistle on level 3, where you sit on the little white block near the goal card and are eventually able to go behind the dark ending portion of the level and get the whistle. The mini-fortress whistle was pretty easy this time, which is where you get the Raccoon leaf and fly to the area above the door to be led into a room with the whistle. During level 4, I tried to get all of the coins so I could get the white toadstool house, but I only got 38 coins. Oh well. I played the card matching game after I beat level 6, and I matched star cards and the 10 coin cards. In my satchel after completing world one: A whistle, a leaf, a whistle, a star, a star, a leaf, and a P-wing. I want to try to conserve as much as I can in my satchel, because when I get to worlds 7 and 8, things are going to get rough. I was able to get to Larry Koopa without getting hurt, but I got hurt almost immediately after I started to confront him during our battle. Grass land is pretty easy, so I didn't have much difficulty. Tomorrow, I'll talk about Desert Land.

Walking the dog, taking out the trash, getting the mail.

2008-03-08T15:59:00.001-07:00

My Patience is Wearing Thyn

2008-03-07T17:55:00.000-07:00

I bought a computer that I love to use. I bought it last year, and ever since I just look at it and I have a sense of pride for it. It's not a smug type of pride, it's like a father watching his son read a book by himself type of pride. I'm very glad that I bought it, and I don't regret it. However, it came with a mouse that is a real p.o.s. It's one of them "wi-fi" mice, and it is supposed to be real high-tech. It doesn't look like it has a right click button, but it is implied that when you click on the right side of the mouse, the right click button will be activated. This is true only 25% of the time. Also, my little ball in the middle of the mouse supposedly acts as a 360º scroll wheel. IT DOESN'T WORK. I am honestly thinking of throwing my glass tumbler across the room into the wall, watching it shatter, as I type this. It would make me feel just a little bit better about this nasty mouse that is retailed at $49.99. I'm going to take a shower now.

Also, I cut my hair short. I recently started feeling very disorganized and out of place because of my head covered in stray, scraggly hair. I looked a lot like this, but worse:

The barber used them thinning shears, and I told that ol' barber to do a second wave with them thinning shears. I think that there are about five strands of hair per little hole that the hair grows out of (I can't remember them names) on my head. The problem with my new do, however, is that I now think I look like the third member of Julie Webb's sex-starved love triangle.

The Best Movie of the Summer

2008-02-25T22:39:00.000-07:00

I was supposed to do homework tonight. As I was working, I decided to do this:

The Best Movie Ever Seen

Have I made a mistake?

2008-02-21T20:03:00.001-07:00

I just bought this. I hope I didn't make a mistake. I'm setting it up right now.

New Jersey Freakshows

2008-02-18T20:43:00.000-07:00

That's pretty much all I have to say.

Well spoken ginger-haired youth with drum set has bone to pick.

2008-02-14T08:21:00.000-07:00

This video is not for the faint of heart. Speaking of hearts, Happy Valentine's Day.

Corleone

2008-02-10T02:57:00.001-07:00

I was a little bored, so I thought I'd update my blog a little bit. I'd love to hear what you think about it.

My brother painted this picture, and I just wanted to share it with everyone. This is a portrait of Vito Corleone (Robert De Niro's character in The Godfather, Part II) done in the monumental Renaissance style. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

I had a pretty lame week, but oh well. Among other things, I lost my Apple® iPod™ so I've been pretty upset lately. Maybe thingz will change this next week. I also got rear ended on my way to work on Friday, and I misplaced the information I received from the lady who hit my car. She lives in my neighborhood, so hopefully I'll have a chance of finding her; or perhaps she'll have some decency and contact me.

This video was a nice one to watch. Just be patient with the violence and find out why this man was arrested in the first place.

Dear God, please help me through this...

2008-02-08T00:51:00.000-07:00

I was incredibly tired at about 11 o'clock. I decided to check my e-mail, and ended up downloading an album by Calvin Harris. After listening to one song, I was wide awake, pumping with adrenaline and dancing wildly at my desk. I plugged my giant earphones into the computer and have been wide awake ever since. I hope that tomorrow morning I will be able to wake up in time for my meeting at work. May the Lord Christ Jesus be able to bless me with strength tomorrow.

In the meantime, I have decided to get cracking on recording some music. My problem is that I don't know where to start. All I know is that I am going to write a song called Ultra Sexx Hotel, and it will start off with a huge medley of me singing the title track in beautiful harmony. Here is a song that I also danced to:

Digitalism - Homezone

Problems.

2008-01-31T13:33:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to upload an image for the top of this scrapbooking website, and each time I upload it to the world wide web, the colors become distorted and completely different from what I originally intended. So I'm having a bad day. But I did have a great time taking my test today at school, which took me all of eight minutes to complete. The easiest test I have ever taken, and it's all downhill from here. I don't have much time, but here's a song today. I don't know where I got it from, but most likely I got it from Badger. It's Camp America's remix of Athlete's Hurricane.

Athlete - Hurricane (Camp America Remix)

Here we go...

2008-01-27T17:14:00.001-07:00

The writer David Lynch (Mulholland Dr.) explains watching movies on an iPhone:

One more similar video...

2008-01-24T20:41:00.001-07:00

Watch the video from the previous post first, and then watch this one:

Snow snow snow...

2008-01-21T13:48:00.000-07:00

In the past week, I have received two citations for expired car registration. I am losing my mind with anger. I haven't been driving around when I get the citation, I'm parked at school and see a funny little yellow piece of paper on my windshield. I just don't have the heart to register my car yet. Does anyone know if I can try to cancel one of my tickets? If I tell them that I had just barely gotten a ticket for expired tags, and say that the little sticker is on its way, would that work? Oh my.

I found this song to be really nice. It is The Real Tuesday Weld's Last Words. Tell me if you enjoy it. Have a good day. Not much to post here.

The Real Tuesday Weld - Last Words

A new look is on its way...

2008-01-07T23:45:00.001-07:00

At school today, my substitute Film teacher (yes, it was the first day, and our real teacher wasn't even there, it was some local film director who makes educational shorts) asked the students to talk about films that they saw over the holiday break. A boy who is clearly fond of 311 immediately said that one Bill Smith movie. When the teacher asked why he liked it, his response was "...because it kicked ass! I also liked seeing Will Smith's abs, too." I decided to give him a very dirty look. He made several other comments throughout the class, one of which was totally out of place. The teacher was asking about character development or something, and for serious, this asshole raises his hand and says (this time with a more earnest tone in his voice) "I also liked Gladiator, too, because it was nice to see Maximus get revenge on the guys that wronged him."

Dipshit isn't the right word, but it's the first word that comes to mind.

I'm nearly done with the book Choke, and it honestly isn't a very wholesome book. It is fun to read, though, so I'm going to stick with it. I had a dinner with some missionary friends on Saturday, and one of them went to Trolley Squares that day and bought several movie tickets for the Sundance Film Festival. He told me that the silver screen version of Choke is going to be released this year at the festival, and I got a little excited. Not completely excited, but just a little. I might go see it.

I am currently working on giving this blog a new look, and it will be shifting over to the Tumblr blog site, so keep your eyes peeled. I'm hoping I can come up with something that is very pretty.

Here is a song tonight:

Black Kids - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You

Two Songs and a Small List.

2008-01-06T21:43:00.000-07:00

I will make this brief. School is starting tomorrow, and I'm a little nervous; but I got a promotion at work, and that evens things out a bit. So that was a great start to a new year. Congratulations, me. Not that 2007 was a bore, I did have some good moments. I'll just share some things:

The two very fine road trips, one to San Francisco and Disneyland, and the other to the Northwest coast.
Arcade Fire's Neon Bible was most likely my favorite album of the year, and their performance at Thanksgiving Point was really great, too. If I hadn't have ripped my jean doing the Charleston, that evening would have been perfect.
No Country for Old Men was great. The more I have thought about it, the more I really enjoy that movie. Josh Brolin showed us that The Goonies wasn't the only film he could portray a badass in, and Tommy Lee Jones' performance was great. Javier Bardem's Anton Chigurh spoke for itself as the serial killing pageboy from Hell.
Moving into a new house was a fun experience for me this year, too.

I wasn't planning on doing a Best Of: 2007 list this year, so I'll just stick to this small list. I gave you two songs tonight. One is by the band The Go Find, the other is by Brad Laner. I'm going to try to keep posting more often. Have a good one.

The Go Find - Dictionary

Brad Laner - Find Out

Just a quick song for you all...

2007-11-29T13:54:00.001-07:00

I like the intro to this song. It's by the band Yeasayer, and the song is entitled Sunrise, from their album All Hour Cymbals. The album was released earlier this year, and I think it's a nice tune. Have a good holiday season.

Yeasayer - Sunrise

Just a quick picture for you...

2007-11-18T02:59:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to show everyone this picture of an incredible dog. My last post was about a kit, and now I will show you a pup. I will have a song up for you all to listen to shortly. Happy Thanksgiving.

Kit-Kats, Twix, and Roadkill.

2007-11-05T23:20:00.000-07:00

For about two weeks, a kitty decided to live with me. Probably the most honest cat I've ever met; and I decided to name him Albert Brooks. Very snugly, Albert would always make sure each person he came in contact with would give him attention. I took him in as one of my own, and one day I chose to make him a subject of a recent photo shoot. So I took this picture of him. After the two weeks, the cuddling, the photo shoot, and the diarrhea, he left. I don't know what happened to him. Perhaps he moved on to another family, bringing them a ray of hope to whatever dark trial was haunting them. Or maybe he just got squished by a passing car. I'm guessing it's the latter. In honor of Albert Brooks, I also gave you a song by Beirut from the latest album The Flying Club Cup. The song is entitled Nantes, and it is really nice to listen to. Enjoy your week.

Beirut - Nantes

Oh yeah, I forgot...

2007-09-30T20:49:00.000-06:00

I forgot to tell you about my experience seeing LCD Soundsystem and The Arcade Fire live. It was an incredible encounter. LCD Soundsystem sounded amazing. Perfect sound. I caught a shot of James Murphy, who I recently found out is into ultimate fighting when he is not playing in his Grammy Award winning musical act. The Arcade Fire blew the audience away with a fabulous performance. It was a fantastic end to a fine month of music - although I didn't get a chance to go to many concerts this month. October is coming up, and there will be tricks and treats around every corner. I believe I'll begin this month with a treat; here are two great songs:

Neighborhood #3 (Power Out) - The Arcade Fire

Disco Infiltrator - LCD Soundsystem

Songs I've been attracted to:

2007-09-30T20:09:00.001-06:00

I haven't been able to take my photographs lately. I am in awful classes with complete Mongoloids and hokey professors; and I am stuck working more hours than I can deal with. I fear it will break me. But I have had time to get my ears around some great musical acts. I recently have been very attracted to Marc Bolan and T. Rex. So I will share a song with you that I am in love with by Marc Bolan. The song is entitled Hippy Gumbo, and the title describes it perfectly. You will feel like a regular at a waterfront café in The Big Easy. I will also add a song called So Low, So High by Northampton regulars, Maps. This album is pretty good, but may be a bit too pretentious. Take a listen and let me know.

Marc Bolan - Hippy Gumbo

Maps - So Low, So High

Unite!

2007-09-25T12:17:00.001-06:00

I had a song in my library by this group called Tiger Tunes from Denmark. I thought the song was pretty fun, but it never really caught my ear. The song was called The Walk, and I can't remember where I got it from; nor could I ever find out what album it was. But I was bored one day and decided to look for the album artwork for this song. As I was searching, I came across an album that they released in 2005 entitled Absolutely Worthless Compared to Other Books. The songs on this album really intrigued me. Enjoy these songs. The first is the song The Walk from who knows what album, and the second is entitled (Angry Kids of the World) Unite! Enjoy. The picture I attached was from a little festival I went to a couple of weeks ago. I couldn't think of anything else to post visually, so here you go.

(Angry Kids of the World) Unite! - Tiger Tunes

The Walk - Tiger Tunes

Pick Up Your Headphones, Please.

2007-08-27T00:05:00.000-06:00

The school season has started, and once again, the time for fall is approaching. I believe I said this last year, but Fall might be my favorite season of all. It's very nostalgic. I take a lot more pictures in the fall, so be prepared. Either way, I hope you enjoy the songs I am going to bring to you tonight. The first song being from a band called The Clientele, and the song is entitled From Brighton Beach to Santa Monica. A good song to listen to when driving to a favorite location. The Clientele is a London based band signed to Merge Records here in the U.S. I decided to give you one more song by the aforementioned musical act, and this one is entitled The Dance of the Hours (both songs from the album God Save the Clientele). The picture below is of some very fine bluegrass musicians on the streets of Seattle, WA. I hope you all have a lovely ending week of August.

The Clientele - From Brighton Beach to Santa Monica

The Clientele - The Dance of the Hours

The Trains Don't Run on Time

2007-08-13T21:20:00.001-06:00

Canasta - Firenze

Hey all you out there in cyberworld, it's been a while since I have written. The song I have chosen today is Firenze, by Chicago's Canasta. The song is an NPR rip that I received from a colleague, but is also on the album We Were Set Up, released in November 2005. The pictures I have chosen are from a recent trip I took to Seaside, OR. It was a good time. It has been a long time since a post, but I am going to try to put some more posts up. No one reads them, anyways. The month of September should be a good one for concerts. It usually is, I have found. Arcade Fire, LCD Soundsystem, Ben Kweller, The New Pornographers, The White Stripes, and many others are coming this month. It will be nice to visit those concerts. Anyhow, have a great time.

The Great Feeling of Being FUNemployed!

2007-05-01T22:01:00.000-06:00

I have worked at my last job for a year solid. That's pretty good for me, a 22 year-old college student working at level-entry jobs to buy goods and services. I called it quits, and am now trying to do whatever possible to find a replacement. This week, I am going to be looking for a new job somewhere else while I try to save money and clean up my house to prepare for the move. I'm moving to a new location as well, just in case you care at all. I've included a song by a band called Lucky Soul, the song entitled Get Outta Town! It has a Pipettes' sound to it, and it is pretty fun and delicious. Enjoy it while it lasts. Also, keep in mind that TaB, the diet cola, was first introduced in 1963. It had the sweetener cyclamate in it at first, and then switched to the carcinogen saccharin in 1969. Just in case the opportunity comes to enlighten your friends about TaB, you can do so.

Lucky Soul - Get Outta Town!

Wamp Wamp

2007-04-19T00:26:00.000-06:00

I haven't been on a big photo phrenzy lately, so I'll give you an older picture that I have. I need to take some time to take more pictures for fun. Oh well. I'm in the process of changing jobs, and does it ever feel good. I'm using up my paid time off this month, and I've had some time to myself to work on some of my own recording, to clean up my home, and prepare for the move. The song I've attached is a remix by Les Bank Robbers, and the song is Wamp Wamp. The guitar part of the song is from somewhere else I'm sure, but I can't put my finger on it. I hope you enjoy it.

Wamp Wamp (Vampire Weekend Remix)

Think about it for a while...

2007-03-31T22:07:00.000-06:00

I've been in sort of a weird mood today. It's been a day for me to contemplate my future and think about things for a little while, and it's been nice. I would like to go back to California for a little while longer, that's for sure. It was really beautiful in San Francisco. Or maybe I'll go to Seattle. That is also an incredible city. Anyhow, I have a really good song for you today. The song is by Ferraby Lionheart and is on their self-titled EP. The song is entitled Tickets to Crickets, and has a great piano pop opening to it. It's a good song to think to. I have two more pictures from my adventures in California. The picture of the Transamerica Pyramid is supposed to be from that angle. I think it is very interesting.

Tickets to Crickets

Vacation...

2007-03-24T15:04:00.000-06:00

Well, I had a great time on vacation. I was in San Francisco and then drove down to Anaheim to experience Disneyland. It was well needed, as well as deserved. Here are some pictures of the journey, the pictures I took of the people joining me are yet to be released, as I haven't gotten them to sign a release form as of yet. But these pictures you will like, as well as a song by a wonderful artist named Mirah. The song is called Archipelago, and is on her album You Think It's Like this but Really It's Like This. I hope you enjoy everything I have taught you. I have to clean my area now, so I don't have much more time to talk about my sabbatical. But if you have any comments, leave some. Thank you so much for your time. And as always, I love and appreciate all you do for me. The picture to the left is a very fine palm tree right outside the Tower of Terror. The other pictures are three I took while I was in San Fran. The Golden Gate, Chinatown, and a shot of the Oakland Bay Bridge while driving away from Chinatown. There was also a Gentleman's club called "Fritz That's Too," and as of yet we haven't been able to figure out what that is supposed to mean. Apparently it is the biggest and most popular strip club in the Los Angeles area, and I don't think that anyone knows what it means either. Have a wonderful day.

Mirah - Archipelago

X96 Underexposed...

2007-02-26T21:21:00.000-07:00

There is a little radio station in my home town called X96. Every DJ on that radio station has "I'm incredibly famous because I'm a local radio personality" disorder. Especially that toad Bill Allred. He is a horrible excuse for a human being, and needs to do the valley a favor and pass away. I usually don't listen to the radio, but one particular night, I was driving home from school and my iPod ran out of juice. So I decided to give it a listen. They were doing the popular X96 Exposed radio show at the time. The DJ plays three songs from new artists, and the audience calls in to choose which one is the best. The best song goes on to the next night, and competes against two more songs. Get the picture? Well a pretty decent song by The Fratellis was playing against Canadian prodigies The Arcade Fire. Everyone who normally listens to the radio nowadays becomes stuck on the Stadium Arcadium rut, and doesn't broaden their palette. So, people called in to complain how awful The Arcade Fire was. I was obviously very annoyed at these people's stupidity, so I had to call in to vote for my boyz. The DJ then compared them to 20th century artist Jackson Pollock - which really made me upset. Anyhow, I decided tonight to do a little Exposed session of my own. I have three songs, and if anyone even looks at this site, comment on which one you think is the best. Thank you for your time.

The Arcade Fire - Keep the Car Running
This was the song that was on the radio that night. I thought I'd see who likes it.

Goldenboy - Summer of the Evening
Just a plain old fashioned good song. Sounds sort of indie-folkish.

Papercuts - Take the 227th Exit
Papercuts have adopted a Robert Zimmerman sound to their music, and it shows.

One Part Electric, Two Parts Eclectic...

2007-02-24T14:28:00.000-07:00

I just have two songs for you by two different Middle European bands. The first is from Deutsch indie sensation Ms. John Soda. Their album Notes and the Like has nine fun songs to keep you sipping the delicious Soda all day long. The track I have included is their single, Hands. Do enjoy, please, as I think it is fabulous. I would like to thank my friend Anne for introducing me to this fantastic duo.

Ms. John Soda - Hands

And the next song is something that might be one of those songs that you listen to and you can't stop thinking you've heard it somewhere before - but can't quite put your finger on it. The artist is called Röyksopp, a couple of Norwegians with their new album Melody A.M. The track, Remind Me, is on an American insurance commercial. The one where the caveman is on the People Mover at the airport while he sees an offensive advertisement. This song is in the background. It is a fabulous little song. I hope you enjoy it.

Röyksopp - Remind Me

Here are some more songs. And a photo.

2007-02-21T21:48:00.000-07:00

Good morning brothers and sisters. I have just two songs for you tonight. The first one being a song from an EP made in July by Brooklyn indie family Bishop Allen. The song is Click Click Click Click.

Bishop Allen - Click Click Click Click

Finally, here is one gem that will keep you looking for more excitement. Benoît Piolard, born the same year Van Halen's Jump was released, has an album out called Précis - meaning in French "concise" or "stopped." Like you even care. Here's the song.

Benoît Pioulard - Triggering Back

Like many of you know, our beloved Pop idol Britney Spears recently went on a shaving binge. On the website stereogum.com, there was a contest entitled "Good News for People Who Love Bald News." The contest was simple: make a funny photoshopped picture of Britney with her new hairdo, and win a copy of Kevin Federline's new album! Unopened! This was the photo I submitted:

There you have it. I had the day off, so I had a lot of spare time on my hands. I hope you enjoy these little pictures. And the little songs, too. I went and saw the movie Breach and I thought it was really good. If you have half a brain in your head, you would go and see it. Thank you all so much.

Now the year has rang in and I have an idea...

2007-02-20T23:40:00.000-07:00

Well everybody, I decided to make another post. Just one picture, but with this new year I decided to add another great feature to The Spider Show Photo Gallery. We here are going to start turning The Spider Show into a Photo and Music Blog. I hope you enjoy this first song I have posted as well. This is a talented young bloke named Carey Ott. He has a new album released entitled "Lucid Dream" and I recommend you purchase this. The song I have for you all is called "Am I Just One," and it is fantastic. Things have been going nicely for me lately. I bought a new computer and have been enjoying it thoroughly. I am going to start recording my own music with the machine now, and am going to continue to pursue a career in photography. After months of contemplating what I want to do with my life, I think a photographer is something that will make me happy and keep me from always wanting to fake sick and ditch work. Well, I'm done talking, so I hope you have a fantastic day.
Carey Ott - Am I Just One

December Thyme

2006-11-29T17:43:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I have put any photos up. I feel bad. Well, now I finally have time. School is almost out for the season, and I am doing pretty good in school. I guess. My astronomy class is one where I have no idea how I am doing. I might have an A, I might have a D. We'll see. This bicycle is one of my favorites. So I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Delicious apples. I might be doing an internship at a record label in the summer of 2007. That would be exciting, wouldn't it? I also would like to move out some time soon, but I want to buy some nice furniture so I can have a cool place. If you want to give me money, let me know.

And finally, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas season. These pictures don't really have anything to do with the holidaze, but if you want to think of a theme and apply it to your life I wouldn't mind at all. This is all I have to say tonight.

Reward yourself.

2006-10-03T22:26:00.000-06:00

I went to the photo studio at my school and directed this photograph. And then I put in the advertisements. I thought it was kind of funny, so I decided to post it today. School and work. What a hard thing it is for me to juggle the two. I currently took most of the week off this week so I could gather some of my thoughts and work on some things for school and whatnot. I haven't had time to go out on a real "fun photo shoot" so the blog has been working relatively slow. Not that anyone reads this garbage, anyway. But oh well. I just realized I have an essay to type up that is due tomorrow, so I am gonna have to stop this one short. Sorry about that. Hey, have a wonderful evening. October is finally here. One of my favorite months.

Life in the fall...

2006-09-19T23:28:00.000-06:00

I love autumn. I have always found it so serene. It's a time of year that makes you feel homesick and glad to be home all at the same time. Things always seem busier in the Fall, don't they? Summer has lazy days and Spring has rainy days, but Fall and Winter (up until Christmas) always seem to be packed full of things to do. Even if you decide to stay in one night to watch a nostalgic film with a fire and a cup of cocoa, even then it seems like it was written in your schedule. Or when you randomly decide to go out on the town and pick a place to relax outside, it feels like it was planned weeks in advance. I don't know. Maybe the cold air just makes people feel like they have a tight schedule. Or maybe it's something else.

I bought a car last weekend. It's my first big purchase in that regard. It's a VW Jetta, and it is absolutely delicious. I really enjoy it, and it makes me feel like a grown up. I will never be a grown up, though, so I can just forget about that. I still have no idea what I want to do with my life. I love music, but I can't get out of my "not being able to play music" rut that I'm in. I can't complete songs, I don't have enough money to purchase musical equipment that at the moment I don't really need, and I'm having a hard time finding my sound and finding people who want to have that same sound, whatever that may be. Or I could go into film and photography. I don't know. We'll see.

That's about it. Right now, it seems like I have only one good friend. You know who you are.

Jared Boone, the Photojournalist

2006-09-12T22:23:00.000-06:00

So yesterday I had to take some photographs for one of my classes in college, and so I decided to go to the State Fair. I thought it would be a good idea, but I realized while I was driving there that I would have to pay for parking and entering. But knowing that I was a poor college student, I didn't want to have to do that. So, I had to think of an idea where I could get in for no charge and also be able to walk around freely and not avoid security.

When I drove up to the parking booth, I told the girl there that I was a photographer for a local newspaper, and I was here to take photos of the fair for a report, and if I still had to pay for parking. The girl was very nice, and gave me a media parking pass. I WAS IN. I had one of the closest spots and snickered to myself as I saw hundreds of people walking great distances to get to the fair entrance. Next, instead of waiting at the main entrance line like some dummy, I went to the side to the security and "badge only" entrance, where I told them my name was Jared Boone, a photographer. They had me sign in on the media list, gave me a media badge, and let me enter. All access pass to the greatest events of the fair: The Beach Boys tribute band, the worlds largest Crocodile, and the FunFair Rides n' Games. I could go anywhere, and no one was giving me weird looks when I had my photo equipment because of my amazing MEDIA pass. Thank you, Jared Boone.

I guess it just comes to show that if you look like you are supposed to do or say something when you're not, people will not question your motives. One of the security guards looked at me like he wanted to say something as I entered, but he felt he couldn't should he have been wrong. So there is a little tip for any of you who want to get away with anything.

How am I supposed to act?

2006-09-12T21:30:00.000-06:00

I am having a problem. I may be having a problem. Listen: I don't know how to socialize with people. On one side, I find myself very intelligent, charming, witty, funny, talented, bold, and fun to be around - qualities that people look for when communicating with other people - but on the other hand, find myself sickening, timid, hideous, shallow, materialistic, and somewhat of a flake - qualities that will make people turn the other way when looking for someone to talk with. The reason I chose these two pictures is because they sort of make me look at myself as a person. The picture above has a lot of structure and composition: the columns to the left give the picture linear definition, as to make you look forward, while the tree off to the center left of the photograph makes you look at the photograph near the front of the landscape. Basically to say, "how am I doing as a person now? Why aren't you progressing socially? physically? mentally? spiritually? And what are you going to do now and in the near future to fix those things you want to about yourself?" The picture on the bottom, if you notice, has the word "Self" focused in the front. Not to sound selfish, but if you want to change society or change something in life or do something good for others, do something good for yourself first, change yourself first. Clean the inner vessel first and foremost, and then change the world.

I guess I just answered my own question.

People of the Earth, join me!

2006-08-31T22:38:00.000-06:00

These are some pictures of some people I saw on the beach about a month ago. It was a very refreshing thing to go to the beach in Oregon. I suggest you try it (as I believe I have previously mentioned). I have officially started school, and I'm not going to lie to you, I really enjoy it. It gives me a strong sense of direction and really makes me feel good because I am now constanly busy; there really is nothing quite like it. I have been thinking a lot about life lately, and it turns out that you really need to have more than just one anchor in your life to keep you afloat. Three or four is a minimum. Keep that in mind, and your attitude will really change, and your decision to keep a good attitude will stay with you.

Here is a little boy that seemed to think he was in a nudist colony on the Gulf Coast. He was absolutely adorable, but don't worry, I had permission from the parent to take this. I'm not some creepy man that loves taking pictures of naked babies.

These two love birds were wed on the oceanside, and I caught a glimpse of them contemplating their new life together as they looked into the deep blue ocean. I would've ran into the ocean and tried to drown myself if I got married on the beach, but that's just me.

A little boy stops playing with his beach ball to think about life insurance and how he will afford it.

The same bride with her mother, enjoying the beautiful landscape and celebrating the new marriage.

A very entertaining video

2006-08-21T23:53:00.000-06:00

I found this video to be very entertaining and very creative; not to mention very well done. So enjoy.

Twirl the Baton, Jeff

2006-08-17T21:22:00.001-06:00

There are a lot of new things happening now. Aside from being sexually harassed and violated at work, getting neck-deep in debt, and being diagnosed with carpal-tunnel, things are going pretty good. School is starting on the 23rd, so I am getting excited for that. I am proud to say that I am going to be able to pay school all off by November, so it really makes things nice for me. I still need to buy a new computer and a new keyboard/workstation, but other than that, I am content. These are pictures I took one day at an old mountain lodge up in a small canyon in Utah. These pictures tell some sort of a story, in that it was completely empty and barren. I hope you enjoy them.

Behind the old lodge was a line up of old chairs. It looked like a wedding gone awry. One side of the two columns of chairs were tipped over, with the few chairs in the front facing the rest of the vacant crowd. As if the bride was to leave her husband-to-be and run down the mountain and commit suicide before making a strong commitment to another person. It looked bleak and the cold air wasn't helping either.

On the way up the canyon we found an old pavillion park area, obviously closed down to the general public, but a big gathering place for heroin addicts and sex-starved adolescents. The shadows and beams of light are obviously having some kind of battle with each other in this beautiful photograph, as if the sun was trying to clean up the drug and teen pregnancy problem of the earth he has been watching over for quite some time now.

On the front of the old lodge was a medieval wooden door with iron handles and four flags of the prominent olympic leaders. Most likely John Goodman and his bowling alley were behind the big castle doors.

The side staircase on the west wing of the old lodge obviously hadn't been walked down for what looked like years. The winding staircase looked like an attraction for compound fractures and broken necks. The black and white contrast shows an ominous view of the frightening two-story stairwell.

Extreme Close-up!

2006-08-09T13:24:00.000-06:00

Here are eight close-up pictures I really enjoy; I like to take pictures of close-up items, particularly flowers. But here you go, enjoy them and try not to cry so hard that the computer gets ruined.

2006-08-02T22:26:00.000-06:00

Well, here is one of the first pictures I have taken. This one is my favorite; I went to Cannon Beach, Oregon and found some brilliant areas to take portraits. This is a portrait of some manual sand buggiez that you can ride around in. I think that you usually ride around in buggiez, so the last half of the previous sentence wouldn't have mattered.

The beaches in the Northwest are absolutely phenomenal. Here are some additional pictures that will make you go ga-ga.

The little Joey Starfish here is just hangin' out, and I caught a fantastic picture of him looking very natural in his ocean-side lounging.

These are just some of the pictures that I have taken so far. Keep an eye out for more to come. I am currently going to college, and next semester I will be done with the first half (before getting the "Bachelor Pad"). I recently left my internet residence at Myspace to mature to a higher level of e-communication. The whole Myspace scene is very pretentious and narcissistic (my two best traits), and I just thought it was time to move on. Keep posted for more great pictures and information.